Ok, we fired Samantha, the USA GPS voice because she was butchering all the Spanish pronunciations of the streets and highways we are travelling. I felt bad for her for a minute but she was really really irritating. So now it is Ana from Latin America but that means we have to follow directions in Spanish as well. A crash course whilst navigating the Autopista in Guadalajara. Interesting to say the least.

We took the toll road through Colima to get here, very boring except for 2 guys carrying tree trunks down the highway and what appeared to be a dead horse. Oh, and the volcano was smoking so that was pretty neat as well. We went through 3 tolls costing 125p each. Now these tolls are for the upkeep of the road, divided highway and all that. But, one special stretch of road is single lane, going uphill and every massive Mexican truck loaded with sugarcane flying everywhere is directly in front of you. And you know what’s at the top of the hill? A double lane, divided highway, that’s what. Seriously?! Well, Nick swore a blue streak. The kids are now much more educated in English swear words.

Once we pulled into town and went for a wander around the square, we had a bite to eat, booked a hotel and then had to find the hotel in the dark. That was a mistake. This is Mexican, large city, 5 lane, aggressive driving. We trusted Ana to take us there and she did okay except for not mentioning that we had to pull across 5 lanes choked with buses spewing black smoke, taxis weaving in and out, and people cycling. Seriously cycling, in the dark on a major freeway. Needless to say we missed our entrance to the hotel. Nick pulled over across the street and we all just stared at it forlornly. Our only option was to go around the ring road again and have another crack at it. This time Nick wasn’t taking any shit and he drove just like the Mexicans and we made it! I think I sprouted a few new grey hairs.

So here we are. At the El Tapatio Hotel, a gated bizarre collection of private residences and resort. It has a winding cobblestone road that goes up, up, up and the hotel is at the top. It has a 360 degree view of the city and the biggest swimming pool I have ever seen. There is a nightclub, 3 restaurants, a game room, store, etc. The most interesting thing is that it is crawling with the federales. There are at least a hundred of them. They are patrolling, and one is sitting out by our car now. Everyone is acting nonchalant but when we asked at reception he was vague and wouldn’t say. I don’t know if I feel more safe or less. The bellman said there is an “event” happening so perhaps someone important is here for a wedding or meeting. It reminds us of another well maintained but perpetually empty resort called Las Hadas, reportedly run by a cartel. I’m curious to see what it looks by daylight.

Our food on the road hasn’t been great. I had fruit and nuts in the car today but we ended up skipping lunch and had an early dinner around 4. Georgia was ready to kill by then and honestly, we were all cranky. That was 5 hours in the car. Of course everyone was hungry again at 9 so we ordered pizza. If we could’ve navigated off this damn mountaintop in the dark we might have been able to find something better.

Tomorrow, we will spend the morning in the beautiful galleries of Tlaquepaque and then head towards Queratero.